8:28 PM - Monday, February 23, 2009
i don't know why. i feel like a dog following my master here and there. why must i listen to you? oh wells. i can't take it any longer. do you know that i'm hurt? deep enough but i still keep it to myself. but everything has gone too far and i can't take it any longer. i need to let it out.
first of all.
-ashley-
i know that you need my help. help in what? for what i see. you are just using me to see her fuck face. i know this is for jp. but i've got feelings too what. then after that i don't think that you will look for me already lah kn. hmm. just for that day only for you, i have to act as your gf just so you can see her fuck face? i feel like a fool.
secondly.
-ls-
do you notice how patient i was to you? after all you did? i know that we're new to each other but you really don't want to see me angry. cos i don't care about anything. what do you think i am? what have i done to you?have i ever leave you alone when im with my friends? or plan to go home with you cos you want to meet someone i like? then when that guy is gone i buih you then tell you i wanna go home with my friend who stays near me. then when my friend wants to wait till 6 you call to tell me that you're joining me and going home with me. thats ok lah. i dun really mind. i think. but if you hadn't notice its happened alot of times where you just leave me alone. what do you treat me as? sampah sarap? bleah. someone ask me. of all my friends. why am i close to you. and if you really wanna know the answer then find out yourself. everything has always got to go your way. then in the bus you didnt even talk to me. wth?! i don't know why everybody is acting weird today. i feel that im going home alone. i feel stupid.
last but not least.
-sapau-
i think you know how i feel. upset. you know why. cos i waited for you then you from school till you alighted. didnt even open your mouth to talk to me. why is everyone treating me like this? what have i done wrong now? i tried to talk. but you seem to ignore. somehow trying to ignore. haissh. when you alighted at your stop. i feel like i was invisible and don't even exist. do you know how much that hurts? alot. i feel useless.
overall. i just wanna say that i feel like a dog. foolishly following everyone around. fuck fuck fuck you all uhh. what do you guys treat me as? who am i to you?
oh gosh. please don't mind my words. i don't really mean it. out of anger. im sorry people. haissh i guess i shall just stop here and don't foolow my emotions. i just can't stop tearing.
goodbye.
i miss faizal superpok.
i need someone to talk to. rightnow. really. someone that understands me.
Labels: when every feelings collide=emotional